Color Up 5K!

I ran the color run in April as a capstone to my losing 35 pounds and to prove to myself that I could run an entire 5K. Today I ran the Color Up 5K to support a friend who was running as a capstone to her weight loss. The Color Up run is much like the Color Run but on a much smaller scale. It was here in town which was nice since I live about 2 miles away from the course. But we started in white and ran through rainbows just the same. There was a big difference in this race, however. In April, the skies were cloudy, there was a cool breeze and it was April. Today, the sun shown down upon us suckers. Beat down on us really. It was already above 80 when we started. This course was also quite hilly. Really, really hilly. Like steep, switchback type hills. And I ran it. Okay, I ran the hardest hill. It was first. Then I kept running. About halfway through the race, I decided I was way too hot and needed to pace myself. Part of me wanted to just keep going to prove to myself that I could do it and that I'm strong and capable and awesome. But a larger part of me wanted to finish the race on my own and not with the help of the medic's go-cart. So I took walk breaks. And I didn't feel guilty one little bit! It was a tough course and I did it. I ran most of it and got myself slathered in color (which is why you go).

I am now a Weight Watchers leader. Like I've arrived. I should feel at the top of my game right? Truth is, I still struggle. I've gained 3 pounds in the past 2 or 3 weeks. I know what I need to do to get back down to where I want to be and I'm not too worried about it. But I realize that even the leaders continue to fight for their ideal body. It's like I said at the beginning of this blog, a journey ends and you turn back around. I'm determined to stay the course. If I have walk breaks in the middle, it's fine. Because in the end, I want to cross that finish line on my own merits. I want to be able to look back 20 years from now and still be at a healthy weight. I have learned that I will always have a weakness for cookies. I don't know if I'll ever be able to just eat one and be fine. But that's something I had to learn for myself. I have to know my weaknesses in order for them to become strengths right?

I had kind of a cool moment while running this morning. I was taking a walk break and kind of eyed a point ahead of me where I would tell myself to start running again. This is how I have always "run" in the past. I would pick a point, start running when I got to it, pick another point and try to push myself to get to that point with the promise of another walk break. Today I picked a point that was several yards ahead of me. I told myself I'll catch my breath then start again. Then something happened. I looked down at my feet and saw that I had started running again. I was a good 20 yards away from my target point. But my body was ready. It just went. My weakness in running was always my head. My inner monologue would tell me cheap lies like "just make it to this point and you can walk." and "if you keep running right now your legs will fall off and your lungs will explode." I've shut up that voice and replaced it with a cheerleader. I can honestly say that I love running and only want to get better. And I'm totally looking forward to my next race! In the cool, cool Fall...

Before
Already sweating!

After
Really sweating.

Leader!

Since February I have been training to become a Weight Watchers leader. There have been a mix of online classes, at work practices and an awesome conference in Orlando that have given me the tools I need to become a leader. Throughout this whole process I have been getting more and more excited about the program and helping people succeed. Orlando was such a great experience. It was 3 intense days of learning with 25 of the greatest people on the planet! It was great in that not only did I learn the ins and outs of leading meetings, but I really learned a lot about myself in the process. I gained more confidence in myself. I gained a better understanding of who I was, am and want to be. I gained some pretty great friends. I didn't gain a pound (woot). Since my trip to Orlando, I have had the opportunity to lead 2 meetings while being observed. I've received great feedback and feel ready to take this on.

Next Tuesday is the day to take it on! I'll be leading the Tuesday night meeting here in town. I am super excited. Can I just say I'm super excited. I feel so comfortable doing this. I have been a receptionist for meetings since March and have loved it. I love getting to know people and their stories. I feel like it's such a privilege to be apart of their lives. This is my chance to give back. My life, and the lives of those closest to me, have been changed for the best since I joined Weight Watchers 9 months ago. There's no way I can repay my leader, my meeting family, the whole program in general. What they have given me is immeasurable and you can't pay back something you can't quantify. So I pay it forward. I love this stuff so much and believe in it, and the people, so much that I am truly excited about my job.

I'm nervous and yet eager to start. I feel like I'm such a newbie still. There are members that have been there much longer than me yet I'll be the one guiding them? But everyone has to start somewhere. One day I'll be the leader up there saying I've kept off my weight for 12 years and still feel awesome. Being a leader totally fits who I am and I am excited. It's awesome to be able to help others and keep myself in check all at the same time. Bring it on Tuesday nights!!

On a quick side note, I kind of impulsively made the decision to run a marathon on my 40th birthday. But it sounds pretty good. So I'm sticking with it. 5K for 30th birthday, 26.2 miles for my 40th. And 50th. And 60th.